Paper #3

I am an expert in tons of worthless things, but the one that shines above the rest is diving. I’ve been diving for almost eight years now and hating it for four so I believe that makes me an expert. I have dove almost every rig(type of diving equipment) and even helped design new super light rigs. I have dove all around the world with the exception of Australia which, sad to say, is supposed to be the best. I’ve taught techniques to the British and Kuwaiti divers and was almost killed by the French ones. I have inspected, patched, and salvaged boats and submarines.
It all started in Cancun Mexico when I was fourteen. Our scuba guide Jesus gave me and my buddy, whose name is also Taylor, a full set of gear and told us not to hold our breath. After that informative class on a legitimately dangerous sport I found myself worrying what the Mexican school system might be like. Looking back on it now I suppose I should be grateful T² and I are not dead, but I do wish they told me to make sure my mask was on tight. I spent the next year diving in a rock quarry wish freakishly huge.
When I was sixteen my dad decided it was a good idea to take our skills to the extreme in Key Largo. To this day I do don’t know how or why, but only that god hates because somehow during the dive in Key Largo I found myself alone surrounded by fish. Since I only knew two types of fish and these fish weren’t gold they had to be the only other choose, tuna. I got separated from the group I was with and later got separated from the dad I was with. Being fifty feet underwater and alone I decided it was a good time to interact with the sea life. To my surprise the Tuna I had found didn’t swim away when I touched them, only turned and stared at me. You can imagine the amazement I felt when I first learned I had a psychic connection with sea life. After a couple of minutes with the Tuna I decided to find the boat. When broke the surface I was immediately bombarded with advice and warnings to get out of the water. Apparently the Tuna were actually barracuda.
When I was eighteen I decided to join the army and amazing was given a slot as an Army Deep Sea Diver. I went through about a year of school and graduated from Naval Diving and Salvage Training center. While I was there I learned how to dive with scuba, hard hats, and chambers. I also learned how cut and weld under water, salvage boats and blow blows up. After I graduated I was stationed in Hawaii for a couple of months and there I got to dive in Asian invested coral reefs and sunken crystal meth boats. I also got to dive with dolphins and even the occasional shark.
After a few months in Hawaii I was deployed to the Middle East where I did the majority of my diving. When I was in Kuwait I would go with a dive team out into the Persian Gulf and spear fish. I spent most of my time inspecting boats for mines and fishing line, but every once in a while one would show up with a hole in the side. I was even awarded a Navy Achievement Medal for volunteering to patch a coast guard ship while it was sinking. The Navy said it was selfless, but now I think I was pretty stupid for doing it.
When I got back to Hawaii I got back to the good kind of diving, the kind with dolphins. About a month later someone left the hatch open on a historical Russian submarine during a storm and sank it. Two newbies and I flew to Rhode Island to assist the Navy in salvaging it. The best part of that mission was telling girls at the bar that I was on a top secret mission in Rhode Island to find out how a Russian submarine could have penetrated port security.